And He said, “My presence shall go with you, and I will give you rest.” – Exodus 33:14 (ESV)
And it was a good rest for me.
Time stands still for no one. Has six months passed already? Seems like yesterday that I was writing about a “dark night of the soul.” My goodness how time flies.
There’s an old saying, “The road is paved with good intentions.” I intended to share the progress of how the “dark night” turned into a brighter day. I intended to share a little each day or at least weekly. Yet, somehow just like traveling down a road in the dim light of dawn, suddenly the day is ablaze as the sunshine brightens one’s way. It seems the long dark night turned into day in the blink of an eye.
A family vacation on Tybee Island, Georgia was a great start to a new day. My daughter and her family met me and my husband at a house she had rented for the week. Both our vehicles arrived within minutes of each other. The grandchildren, scrambling out of their car to lay claim on the bedrooms, brought their own air of excitement to a promising week of rest and relaxation. My son was able to join us the following day.
There is just something about listening to and watching the ebb and flow of the surf that is sooooo relaxing for me. It has a hypnotic rhythm that I find peaceful. The morning sunrises and evening moonlit strolls and star-gazing with the 11, 9 and 6-year-old grandkids added another dimension of joy. Eating freshly caught shrimp at a backwater grill or take out pizza on the veranda at the house, surrounded by laughter and board games was priceless. I had my family with me for a week. All was good in my world. Tick-tock…the time went to quickly.
The Christian Motorcyclists Association (CMA) had its NC state rally at Black Mountain, NC in September. That was a great time filled with wonderful fellowship. Some bikers stayed at a nearby KOA campground, some at local B&B’s, some rented cabins or vacation rentals and others stayed at the conference center where the rally was being hosted. The Blue Ridge Parkway is beautiful in Autumn. (A plus side to this rally was, since my daughter lives about thirty minutes from there, I was able to have lunch with my grandkids during some of the free time. I’m the typical “gra’ma.” I want to see those kids and spoil them every chance I can!)
The CMA offers a special ministry to travelers during the holidays. We set up tables at local rest stops along the interstate highways and provide free drinks and snacks to travelers. Kids, and men especially, enjoy looking at the different motorcycles. We offer listening ears and prayers for those who ask for someone to talk with.
At Thanksgiving, I was blessed to have spent time with a lady traveling back home after visiting with a daughter who is suffering from PTSD caused by a stint in front line battle zones. We shared hot chocolate while we talked about families and life concerns. At the end of our conversation, I prayed with her. She wiped away tears, gave me a hug with a “thank you” and walked back to her car with a smile on her face.
The holidays seemed to have arrived in a blink of an eye. My children came home for both the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. This was the first year in about 16 years that my husband and I didn’t have to travel for the holidays. I must admit, it was nice.
I came to terms with a difficult decision I had been wrestling with for over a year at my place of employment. I knew that they had been discussing a probably policy change that I would have difficulty supporting. My husband, however, made it so much easier to finally make the decision. I shared an email with him that my supervisor had sent out stating the new policy had been passed. My hubby simply said, “You don’t have to back.” I insisted on working a notice though. So I resigned, giving a month notice on November 3, ending nearly 10 years of service with the employer. It was a difficult decision. I enjoyed my work, co-workers and the freedom to minister to others. My position offered flexibility as no other job ever had.
I had given my notice. November 30 was fast approaching. Now what was I suppose to do? I began making plans. I’d go into retirement. I would enjoy sleeping in until the sun rose each morning, instead of getting up at o’dark thirty. I’d be a “stay at home” home-maker and tackle all those household projects that I had been wanting to do for years but couldn’t find the time. I could have a home-cooked dinner on the table at 5pm. I could do this or that and the other….or so I thought. But then, Grace whispered.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. – Jeremiah 29:11 (ESV)
I received a text of a job lead on November 27. It would put me back in the corporate accounting and tax world, but was only part-time. I wasn’t very fond of the idea of going back into the corporate world after ten years of being away, but thought, well it will at least get me out of the house some and give me a little income. (I’m not really the “stay at home” type anyway. I run out of things to do and get bored to easily.) So, with nothing to lose, I applied on November 29th and interviewed on December 1st. I was offered the position on the spot and reported for work three days later. It is not nearly as stressful as the job I left. So far, it’s working out well. Seems God has other plans for me.
And now spring has arrived again. At least it’s trying. The spring snow showers have changed to the green stuff as we yo-yo between cold fronts and 60-70 degrees weather.
I look at my calendar and it’s chocked full of stuff all the way through to September. Easter is fast approaching. There are birthday’s to celebrate. Special CMA activities such as Rolling Thunder in D.C. and bike rallies along the outer-banks and motocross events all through out the summer.
The first CMA spring event was this past Saturday at a motorcycle dealership 40 miles away. I took my motorcycle out for the first time in over a year. It took a lot of courage to get back on it and do a group ride again. When we stopped at our destination I received a lot of “good job”, “you did great”, “how ‘ya feelin’?” and hugs from the group. They were as happy to have a smile on my face as I was. It felt good. I think my husband was especially glad he didn’t have to carry a passenger this time.
“The roads are paved with God’s goodness.”
Who has time for a “dark night of the soul?” Not I! Not anymore!
As I look back through the past several months and I can see God’s wonderful light reflecting on my journey. My life was ablaze with His Grace. I think perhaps my road of good intentions was Grace whispering to me, “The roads are paved with God’s goodness.” I saw how true God’s promises are. Deuteronomy 31:8 reads, “Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.” (New Living Translation) God was there with me every step of the way.
Family and friends may fail us. Institutions may fail us. Government may fail us. However, I know the one and only person who never fails us. He is always there to turn to, to cry out to, to find direction when afraid, discouraged or uncertain. All we have to do is listen for His voice and rest in Him.
I hope you can hear Him. Just look for the signs along your journey . . .and listen. He’s whispering. You can feel it in your heart and soul; in the conversations with family and friends; in the gentleman who opens the door for you; in the check-out clerk at the market; in the laugher of a child; in that job lead; in the beauty of nature; in the promise of prayer by a stranger. Sometime perhaps in a blog as someone shares their stories and life adventures. Shhh…listen closely. Can you hear him?
Thank you for allowing me to share His whisperings in my life during this past difficult year.
To those of you who lifted me in prayer…know that your prayers were answered.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, your love endures forever. When I was afraid, you were with me; You are my God, your love endures forever. When I was dismayed, you strengthened me, you helped me, you upheld me with you righteousness. Your love endures forever. Your promises never fail me. I praise you and thank you. In Christ’s name – amen.